Tuesday, February 20, 2007

So THAT'S why I hate the Nazis so much...

Friends and family are aware that Wonder Woman, in addition to being one of my favorite shows as a young lad, was instrumental in helping me learn to read. Friends and family may not be aware -- as I myself was not aware -- that it was Wonder Woman who was also instrumental in subliminally helping me learn to hate the Nazis.

I've just discovered that you can buy Season One of Wonder Woman on iTunes. And I've also just discovered that almost every episode in Season One of Wonder Woman had something to do with Nazis.

Where was I during all this? How did I not realize that Wonder Woman was fighting the Nazis in every episode? All I'm saying is, here's the iTunes episode description for the 14 episodes from Wonder Woman, Season One:

Episode 1: The New, Original Wonder Woman
Based on the classic comic book character created by Charles Moulton about an Amazon princess who travels to America to fight crime and injustice with her superhuman powers.

Episode 2: Wonder Woman Meets Baroness Von Gunther
An American war hero is implicated in a Nazi spy ring in a confession given by a German spy in prison.

Episode 3: Fausta: The Nazi Wonder Woman
Wonder Woman must use all her cunning and prowess when confronted by her evil Nazi counterpart. (Scott's note: Which I am totally downloading.)

Episode 4: Beauty on Parade
Wonder Woman participates in a beauty pageant suspected of being a front for enemy saboteurs.

Episode 5: The Feminum Mystique, Part I
Wonder Woman tries to rescue Wonder Girl after she is kidnapped by the Nazis who want to learn the secrets of their bracelets and jet. Part one of two-part episode. (Scott's note: Part two, apparently Episode 6: The Feminum Mystique, Part II, is not available.)

Episode 7: Wonder Woman vs. Gargantua
Wonder Woman battles a seven-foot-tall, 500-pound gorilla. (Scott's note: No word on whether it was a Nazi gorilla, or perhaps from an evil petting zoo.)

Episode 8: The Pluto File
An Irish mercenary, carrying the bubonic plague, steals a document that explains the creation of earthquakes for the Nazis.

Episode 9: The Last of the Two Dollar Bills
Wonder Woman thwarts the Nazis' plan to flood the United States with counterfeit $2 bills.

Episode 10: Judgement from Outer Space, Part I
Wonder Woman must rescue an alien ambassador, who came to Earth to pass judgment on mankind and have the planet destroyed, from the Nazis. (Scott's note: What? Read that again -- and what does it have to do with Nazis?)

Episode 11: Judgement from Outer Space, Part II
Wonder Woman must rescue an alien ambassador, who came to Earth to pass judgment on mankind and have the planet destroyed, from the Nazis. (Scott's note: see above.)

Episode 12: Formula No. 407
Wonder Woman and Steve Trevor travel to Argentina to beat a pair of enemy agents to a secret formula that can make rubber as tough as steel.

Episode 13: The Bushwhackers (Scott's note: Seriously.)
Wonder Woman helps a Texas rancher stop a ring of cattle rustlers working for the Nazis. (Scott's note: Wait -- what?)

Episode 14: Wonder Woman in Hollywood
Wonder Woman must stop the Nazis from sabotaging a film about four American war heroes.


Anonymous said...

I LOVE her.

"Get us out from under, Wonder Woman!"

Eva Lyford said...

Wow. You totally pwned the lycos search result for wonder woman in the images section.

P.S. Episode 5 was a favorite of mine as a kid. What was in those bracelets?

Scott S. Semester said...

It's hilarious that this, the Instant Rimshot, and now the Zebra Cartoon (an image I used in a random post that ended up giving me my tagline) are my most searched-for pages.

Thanks for visiting! I've been living for the day someone would say "You totally pwned the lycos search results for" anything!