Saturday, May 02, 2009

Kentucky Derby Memories

Picture it: nine years ago this week, in a small room at the offices of the Diocese of [REDACTED].

As my co-workers and I dutifully do our jobs, our work is momentarily interrupted by a short, round woman -- a diocesan staffer, I think -- parading up and down the hall. At each open door, she stops to model her ridiculously large hat -- a hat which, in any context other than the first weekend in May, would be laughable at best, a crime of fashion at worst. She gets to our door and, for what seems like the tenth time in about ten minutes (we've heard her work her way down the hall to us), she proudly, loudly, and Southernly exclaims: "I'm goin' to the DUUHHRRRBY!"

We do our best not to laugh to her face, and we ask her if she's picked a horse to bet on or whether she'll just be spending her time enjoying mint juleps (though her behavior seems to suggest she has already had at least a few). We wish her a safe and fun trip to the Derby (which we did not pronounce "Duuhhrrrby") and somehow, some way, make it through the rest of our work day.


shouldhavezagged said...

Coincidentally, I just returned from Crowns at the IRT, which was all about HATS! Big, fancy, crazy numbers with hattitude. I bet your former coworker would be outdone in a moment by a Southern Black woman on her way to church (assuming that's not what she was).

Scott S. Semester said...

Haha, well, her hat was impressive, but I'd bet you're right!

How was "Crowns"? I've heard good things.