Wednesday, October 28, 2009

To smile or not to smile

I don't think I've posted this, have I?

Anyway, this is the picture I referenced here. My friend Julie posted this to her Facebook albums a while back, but I can't remember if I ever shared it here.

For a while in 2000 or 2001, this was the most recent picture of me, the one that I was terrified would be the photo that would be used on the evening news over the words "Missing Person" or "Northside Homicide," or, you know, "Donut Hut Tragedy" or whatever. My deep, abiding fear was that if I were ever abducted or otherwise the victim of foul play and/or lethal circumstance, the newsfile picture of me would be the above.

The problem, of course, is that almost every picture of me has me looking similarly cheesy. Therefore, I'm pretty much convinced that if I am ever abducted/murdered/maimed in a hilarious donut bakery accident, the file picture of me is just going to make people laugh out loud, rather than feeling urgency to find me/sadness that my life was cut too short/curiosity as to whether part of me was in the donut they ate that morning.

My friend Sonja took a bunch of pictures of me a couple months ago, and I wasn't really allowed to smile in them. I used one of them as my Twitter profile picture for a while but ultimately switched back to the more washed-out but also more smiley pic I had been using, because I like my face a lot better when it's smiling.

I guess when I get my Driver's License renewed in a few years, I'm not allowed to smile in the picture. This will be decidedly vexing for me, as (a) my natural impulse in front of a camera is to show off the teeth that Mom and Dad Semester spent lots of money to keep clean and cavity-free, and (b) I will very much miss the woman at the Virginia Avenue license branch who, a second before snapping my pic for my last license said, "Show me that Tom Cruise smile. Flash me them pearly whites, baby!"

Which was awesome.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I understand this all too well. I do believe that I have a physiological disorder that makes my face distort into a horribly cheesey face whenever a camera is near. Tragic result: awful pictures...